I don’t read books much. It’s not that I hate reading, but it depends on the book. There are a lot of books that someone offered me to read but none of them were finished reading by me. Though I read Harry Potter books..Hmmm but I only read one of it’s seven books, the book 3. If most of the peoople read all of them, well not me. Not really fond of reading, ever since.

Of all the books that I’ve read (finished it or not) only Little Prince made me cry. Actually the books was given by my cousin years ago. Though I started reading it, but it was still unfinished. Until last Saturday, when I had nothing to do inside my room. I was not feeling well then and felt bored. When I saw the Little Price inside my cabinet and read it. At long last I did read it! (more…)

Nobody’s perfect, that’s a fact. People tend to say exactly what they feel, but do they really tell what’s inside of them? I’m not sure if any of you experience such thing like that. I, myself ever done that. Not only once, but most of the time.

I sometimes fake my self, what I’m feeling just to avoid conflict to someone. My friends always ask me whether I’m really that ok when they start to ask me personal questions. I always say “yes I’m ok.” But they don’t seem to believe. They say my eyes tell it all. Well, I don’t know.

Just yesterday when we hang out. I told them that we’ll meet. Just nothing, drinking or chatting will do. It’s so unusual for me to do that. I don’t usually set up an appointment to my friends. They all wondered, asked themselves, what is going on? It’s so funny when I arrived, they looked at me and asked “Are you ok? What’s your problem?”. I admit, I’ m so tired of hearing that question over and over again. If I’ll say YES, they don’t seem to agree still and if they do, they’re still in doubt.

Well, I guess no matter how I hard I try to keep it by myself, they can tell. Friends seem to feel the real emotions inside you, aren’t they? Coz I believe they’re right. There’s something that’s been bothering me for the past few days. I just want to live life and pretend. But sometimes, I just can’t seem to keep it. It shows…No matter how I keep on denying.

I feel so bad lately because the place that me and my childhood friends was bought by someone whom I don’t know. I’m not sad because it was bought, actually it’s all about the memories.

I’m talking about the vacant lot just outside our house. Before, the lot was a place where everyone can go and play. It has trees, a pond with fishes in it and because it’s quite wide, grasses are everywhere. We used to play there. My family even fall for this place. The owner once said that we are free to use the place while they’re looking for a buyer. We’re like the caretaker of that vacant place. (more…)

“Blood is thicker than water” they say, and I surely agree.

Living in a simple life with good health each day is the one of the things that I thank God everyday. Growing up with my three (older) brothers measn so much to me. Sometimes I feel so special but sometimes I feel like an outcast. I guess it’s because they share most of the things together while I have none.

Misunderstanding, fighting over things and disappointment can never be erase in siblings. There are times when I feel so bad to one of them and I will just go inside my room, unwind and cool down. All the understanding and patience are in me, well, since I am the youngest. That’s always my part. *sigh* (more…)

I was about to sleep this afternoon when I heard the news from the television that actor Heath Ledger was found dead in his apartment in Manhattan, New York. Though I was sleepy still, I then managed to went outside and was shocked with what i saw. I never really expected that he passed away so soon. Just week ago, when i watched his movie Brokeback Mountain (via the internet), which I can say, he did a very well acting job.

The cause of his death is still unknown, though there are sleeping pills that were found near his dead naked body on the floor.

According to the news:

The body was found naked and face-down on the floor of his bedroom by a housekeeper about 3.30pm Tuesday (7.30am Melbourne time).

”There were pills within the vicinity of the bed,” Mr Browne said.

But he stressed that pills were not scattered around Ledger’s body, as had been previously reported.

“There were some prescription medications that included sleeping pills,” he said.

The 28-year-old actor, who had reportedly been ill with pneumonia, had an appointment for a massage at the apartment, which is believed to be his home in Soho in Manhattan.

The housekeeper went to tell Ledger the masseuse had arrived and found him naked and unconscious at the foot of his bed.

Read the rest of the story here… 

May you rest in peace Mr. Ledger, farewell to you…

I was shocked when i heard the news that Dan Fogelberg died. He died because of prostate cancer, which i didn’t know he had one. His song Leader of the Band is one of the classic songs that I really love. This song was sang perfectly by him. I like the message of the song and always remember my father every time I hear this song and this sometimes makes me cry.

What’s good when you’re a singer is that, when you die, the song will always remain the same. You’re song will be forever, no matter how old it had been. Just like this song, i know when i get older, i will sing this still. Hmmm maybe together with my children.

To Dan, thank you for this song. Thank you for sharing this to the world. Thank you for this great inspiration. You are a true legend… you will always be remembered… forever, your song you will played. May you rest in peace.

I am not a huge fan or even a fan of Tyra Banks Show, but I do watch it. I don’t have a choice since everyday when I arrive home, while eating breakfast and turn on the tv, I couldn’t find good show to watch. So, what I’m doing is to watch Tyra’s show. I am not saying that I hate Tyra or the show, it’s just that I am not really into talk shows. But uhm, since it’s been days that I watch Tyra’s show, then maybe it’s now included in my daily routine.

Anyway, this morning, as I watched her show, I was really so into her topic. The show was about three women who have very very low self esteem. This happened when they got jealous of the persons whom they think are “more” than what they are. So, what Tyra did was to let these three women meet the person’s that they’ve been jealous of.

After that, Tyra lets the three “low self-esteem” women have their make-over while those other three women “envied” by them did have make-over, but this time making them ugly together with Tyra.  And then Tyra made an experiment letting her know what will happened if “envied” women will feel insecure or being dump by people around the streets. And yes, exactly they looked-up as if they are the ugliest women around the globe! People passing by tend to look back and you can see it through their eyes that they feel irritated and feel “uh-uh” to “envied” women. On the other hand, “low self-esteem” women who turned to be beautiful this time due to make over enjoyed their day!

Hmmm, i really feel sad to those “envied” women, since they really look sorry for themselves. Though it was just an experiment for the show, but then it feels irritating.  But at least those “low self-esteem” women were all happy for their make-over and hopefully they will maintain those looks for the rest of their lives.

I am not a pretty woman and for sure not ugly. I admit, there are women that I admire most, but I’m not the one who will really like to look like them. Ok yes, i would love to be in their shoes, but hey, this is me, I have my own self! I am proud of who I am, I know what is good and best for me. Being jealous to someone is not really a good idea. So, if i were them, why not fix their selves up? Why not dress well, put some make-up on (a powder and a lip gloss will do), smile and always look up! It’s a matter of self confidence and the way you carry your self.

I admit, that some time in my life, i felt so down. I’ve been hearing a lot of negative comments about me, physically and emotionally. What I always put in mind is that, I have my own life, I know what I’m doing, as long as i don’t push anybody down, then everything will be fine. It’s time to put away those insecurities in our lives and live the way it is.  I love my self! I love being me!

It really annoys me everytime i see somebody that is close to me is going away. It hurts me so bad to miss them. My friend Sarah came home few weeks ago, but then she’ll leave on Thursday, once again because of her work. She’s working in Dubai by the way. She is just one of my friends whom i hate to see go. Just like seeing my friend Kharen go. Though yes, i’ve got nothing to do, but eerrrr missing them is so hard to do. Oh my, i remember friends of mine who left and work abroad of in Manila, my  best friends, brother and my father. You know the feeling of emptiness every time you miss them. During their birthdays and all you have to do is to greet them without even hugging or kissing them on their special days? So sad…

Christmas is coming and yet another year of their absence. I miss all of my friends whom i haven’t seen for a long time…I miss my tatay and I miss my brother. Hope to see all of you all.

I just wonder, if ever one day, I will work abroad for a year or even years, will my friends and family miss me the way i miss them? Hmmm..Sure they will. ^_^